Life’s Weirder Than Fiction

The following purely demonstrates that it’s very important to reread yourself and become your own editors. All of these below are legitimate companies that didn’t spend quite enough time considering how their online names might appear … and be misread. These are not made up. Check them out yourself!

1. Who Represents is where you can find the name of the agent that represents any celebrity. Their Web site is http://www.whorepresents.com/
2. Experts Exchange is a knowledge base where programmers can exchange advice and views at http://www.expertsexchange.com/
3. Looking for a pen? Look no further than Pen Island at www.penisland.net
4. Need a therapist? Try Therapist Finder at www.therapistfinder.com
5. There’s the Italian Power Generator company, www.powergenitalia.com
6. And don’t forget the Mole Station Native Nursery in New South Wales, www.molestationnursery.com
7. If you’re looking for IP computer software, there’s always www.ipanywhere.com
8. The First Cumming Methodist Church Web site is www.cummingfirst.com
9. And the designers at Speed of Art await you at their wacky Web site, www.speedofart.com

The Cracked Throne, by Joshua Palmatier
New York: Daw Books
2006
Fantasy
ISBN: 0-7564-0403-7

The Cracked Throne is the sequel to The Skewed Throne, Joshua Palmatier’s first published novel. In the Skewed Throne, Varis, a gutterscum teenager girl turned bodyguard ascends to the Skewed Throne. She can use a river of power that is enhanced by the White Fire she inherited six years earlier. Her aborted assassination attempt on the current Mistress of Amenkor results in her having to take on the role.

In The Cracked Throne, Varis must learn the new skills required to act as the Mistress of Amenkor (she who sits on the Skewed Throne) and to master the throne. The throne, fed by thousand of souls who have died fashioning it and dying for it, strengtens her own power but also puts her in danger of being overwhelmed by it. Apart from her long-time friend Erik, she cannot trust anyone, the city is threatened by famine, food is disappearing, and she has a vision of Amekor burning, the harbor red with blood. As she tries to grow into her role, Varis will learn much about who she is and what she needs to sacrifice to keep her city and its inhabitants safe.

Joshua Palmatier’s second book in the Throne trilogy has everything a reader of fantasy would want –a young heroine, magic, a vicious and cruel enemy– but his treatment of these elements is fresh and exciting. Contrary to the often two-dimensional characters of fantasy, Palmatier’s are rich, vividly sketched, real. The prose is sparse and effective, and takes us along to witness the growing pains of someone who has not been loved by Fate, but who has the courage to get the job done. He was able to mix perfectly several storylines that lead, in the end, to the same place: the Palace and the ultimate confrontation.

Only one caveat: although it is not necessary to read The Skewed Throne, I would recommend it, since it would be easier to understand Varis’s motivations and background.

All in all, an infinitely exciting, readable book.

Authors Linda Andrews, M. D. Benoit, Elizabeth Burton, Mayra Calvani, Allan Cole, Jackie Griffey, Joan Hall, Gloria Oliver, Cheryl Swanson, Dorothy Thompson, Judy Lawn, Gary Rockey, and Dorien Grey have joined forces with their publisher, Zumaya Publications, to double your ebook fun during Read an eBook Week, March 4-10.

Between March 4 and March 10, buy one ebook from any of those authors and get another absolutely free. You can choose another book by the same author or mix and match, and have your pick of science fiction mysteries, thrillers, fantasy, paranormal romance or non-fiction.

“This is an opportunity for us,” author M. D. Benoit says, “to show that we believe that ebooks are a fun way to read and that readers have the choice of more than one medium when they buy our books.”

Take advantage of this special sale, during Read an ebook week only; visit the special bookstore that will open at Zumaya Publications anytime after midnight March 4 and purchase any of the superb Zumaya titles listed. Then, send a quick note to readanebook@zumayapublications.com from the email you used to make your purchase with your free ebook choice, and we’ll send it to you—simple as that. There’s no limit to how many times you can make a purchase, or how many titles you can buy at one time. Get one. Get them all. Enjoy.

“Zumaya Publications has a book for just about everyone’s taste. We’re delighted to give readers the chance to sample the work of these fine writers,” noted Zumaya Executive Editor Elizabeth K. Burton.

Zumaya Publications LLC is a trade publisher of fine, award-winning fiction and select nonfiction headquartered in Austin, Texas. For the complete catalog of Zumaya titles, visit the website at http://www.zumayapublications.com.

I’m a chronic insomniac. I don’t know when I’ve had seven hours of uninterrupted sleep. I can’t remember. Over the years, I’ve adopted certain techniques to fall asleep, but it’s also the staying asleep that’s the problem for me. I knew there were certain foods that helped, but I wasn’t sure why. Here are the top ten, taken from Beauty Eats on Yahoo! Food, and what they do to your body:

1. Bananas. They’re practically a sleeping pill in a peel. In addition to a bit of soothing melatonin and serotonin, bananas contain magnesium, a muscle relaxant.
2. Chamomile tea. The reason chamomile is such a staple of bedtime tea blends is its mild sedating effect - it’s the perfect natural antidote for restless minds/bodies.
3. Warm milk. It’s not a myth. Milk has some tryptophan - an amino acid that has a sedative - like effect - and calcium, which helps the brain use tryptophan. Plus there’s the psychological throw-back to infancy, when a warm bottle meant “relax, everything’s fine.”
4. Honey. Drizzle a little in your warm milk or herb tea. Lots of sugar is stimulating, but a little glucose tells your brain to turn off orexin, a recently discovered neurotransmitter that’s linked to alertness.
5. Potatoes. A small baked spud won’t overwhelm your GI tract, and it clears away acids that can interfere with yawn-inducing tryptophan. To up the soothing effects, mash it with warm milk.
6. Oatmeal. Oats are a rich source of sleep - inviting melatonin, and a small bowl of warm cereal with a splash of maple syrup is cozy - plus if you’ve got the munchies, it’s filling too.
7. Almonds. A handful of these heart-healthy nuts can be snooze-inducing, as they contain both tryptophan and a nice dose of muscle-relaxing magnesium.
8. Flaxseeds. When life goes awry and feeling down is keeping you up, try sprinkling 2 tablespoons of these healthy little seeds on your bedtime oatmeal. They’re rich in omega-3 fatty acids, a natural mood lifter.
9. Whole-wheat bread. A slice of toast with your tea and honey will release insulin, which helps tryptophan get to your brain, where it’s converted to serotonin and quietly murmurs “time to sleep.”
10. Turkey. It’s the most famous source of tryptophan, credited with all those Thanksgiving naps. But that’s actually modern folklore. Tryptophan works when your stomach’s basically empty, not overstuffed, and when there are some carbs around, not tons of protein. But put a lean slice or two on some whole-wheat bread mid-evening, and you’ve got one of the best sleep inducers in your kitchen.

I found a word count widget at The Zokutou Word Meter, which is very similar to the one NaNoWriMo uses. I’ve decided to post that widget at least once a week to shame me into writing. Ah, I mean motivate me. Here’s my progress on the latest work-in-progress, Entropy:

Writing Progress: Entropy

99,626 / 120,000 (83.0%)

Entropy is the story of how the use of monoculture and genetic modification of foods provoke a potential global famine in the year 2096.